NEWS SNATCH

The Daily Daily’s rolling newsfeed in biscuit-sized mouthfuls. Updated minutely, and in most cases, far less so:

Have you recently experienced a biscuit-sized mouth of news? Maybe you dreamt about that tree again. Send your news snatch to news@dailydaily.co.uk.

WOMANS PAYS FOR ROUND WITH RECEIPT
Tuesday 4th September, 17.19

A Leicestershire woman attempted to pay for a round of drinks with a receipt from a local supermarket last night. Janice Coffercock, 41 handed the ASDA receipt for goods worth £34.27 to the barman of the Windmill Inn in Newbold Verdon. It wasn’t until the staff member pointed out her error that Coffercock offered to pay cash for the two white wines and a pint of Stella Artois.

LOST SANDWICH FOUND IN OTHER HAND
Thursday 30th August, 14.13

After spending several seconds wondering where he’d misplaced his cheese and pickle sandwich, Simon Smedley, 25, realised he was holding it in his other hand. “I could have swore I’d put it back down on the plate, ” said the postman from Redditch, ” but when I looked it simply wasn’t there.” It wasn’t until Smedley stared at his left hand that he realised his error.

DARLINGTON MAN ATTENDS EVENT ON “TOTALLY THE WRONG NIGHT”
Tuesday 28th August, 10.57

A first-time visitor to the Edinburgh Fringe recalled his horror at discovering he should have really gone the night before. 32 year-old Paul Smith from Darlington only realised his mistake after arriving on the final day of the event. “I thought it would be one big party to celebrate the end of another successful Fringe,” exclaimed Smith, “but everybody was desperate to leave after living on beer and crisps for a month.”

SISTER MAY HAVE “BIGGER HEAD THAN BROTHER” CLAIM
Sunday 26th August, 18.24

26 year old Helen Derbyshire, always knew her head was large, but never expected it to be bigger than brother Rob’s “in a million years”, according to a close friend earlier today.

PRESS QUITS BECKHAM
Sunday 26th August, 10.41

The Press Association today announced that they will be retiring from all coverage of David Beckham at the end of the year, ending months of speculation.

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One response

30 08 2007
caroline

Hello – I love the Daily Daily me!

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